


I am Yours (And Very, Very Proud)

by cantfuckinbelievethis



Series: Riley/Yev [5]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Forced coming out, M/M, Making Up, Secrets, Tears, frannie is so like mandy i can't, hurt!Riley, more family in this how exciting!, not very descriptive but still, panic attack tw, protective!frannie, protective!yev, some canon typical violence homophobia + slurs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-16
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-08-31 09:16:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8572750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cantfuckinbelievethis/pseuds/cantfuckinbelievethis
Summary: How Yev finds out about Riley’s crush on Mickey, how everyone finds out about Riley and Yev, and how Riley finds out how hard it is to keep a boyfriend through all this shit.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like and I hope it's not too angsty for you!

After Riley said goodbye to his boyfriend in the entrance to school, the last thing he expected was to get yanked off to the side a few feet from the door. He panicked as he was shoved against a locker. He wondered why the fuck he was getting harassed? It’s not like he kissed Yev goodbye or even touched him. They just nodded to each other and said, “See you at lunch.” It was a pretty innocent goodbye, so Riley couldn’t understand why he was being accosted like this.   
  
    Finally, he steadied himself enough to look up and blink in confusion when he saw one of Frannie’s friends, Emma, glaring down at him. She was a lot taller than him, which was unnerving seeing as he was pretty tall already. Not as tell as Yev, but he was pretty gigantic for someone with Mickey Milkovich as a father.   
  
    ‘I know about you and Yev Milkovich,’ she hissed, scowling.   
  
    Riley just blinked in surprise, heart pounding in his chest. This could _not_ be good. ‘…And?’   
  
    She scoffed, shaking her head. ‘ _And_? I want you to stay the fuck away from him! We were hooking up before you guys ever did, and now he ignores me all the time! You’re _going_ to break up with him. Yev deserves someone who can _really_ satisfy him.’   
  
    Riley really just didn’t know how to react. He just stood there awkwardly for a few moments, looking around to make sure no one could hear them, before saying, ‘You really can’t force me to break up with him…This is really weird.’   
  
    ‘Oh, I can. If you don’t break up with him and stay the hell away, I’m going to tell the entire school you’re dating and then I’ll also tell Yev about your creepy little crush on his dad.’   
  
    Riley’s eyes widened at that new piece of information. ‘How the _fuck_ do you know about that?’   
  
    Emma smirked. ‘Frannie told me.’   
  
    Riley almost groaned in annoyance. There goes him telling Frannie fucking anything. As he thought about what this girl was really doing, his anger grew and he found himself shouting, ‘Yev is _my_ fucking boyfriend, not yours! You need to get over this goddamn stalker obsession with my boyfriend, and _you_ need to back the fuck off! If you tell anyone, including Yev, anything, I will tear you to fucking pieces, you manipulative asshole!’   
  
    He froze then, suddenly realising how many people were staring at him. His heartbeat picked up and he found himself going red as he realised that they _all knew_. Panting sharply, he shoved Emma away from him and rushed down the hall, out the door and towards the football field. He sat under the bleachers until lunch, when he sucked up enough courage to go in and see how his boyfriend was dealing with all of this.   
  


* * *

Yev was not fucking happy. Not only had he found out that everyone knew about him and Riley, although he had only been upset about that for Riley’s sake, Emma — one of his old hook-ups — had told him something really wish he hadn’t heard now. She had stopped him as they came out of Bio and asked gently if she could talk to him. Although he had been a bit freaked out and really just wanted to find Riley and see if he was okay, he agreed and followed her to a secluded corner of the hall.   
  
    ‘I really think you should know that Riley had a crush on your father,’ she had admitted, frowning sympathetically. ‘Frannie told he had this huge plan to try and seduce him.’   
  
    Yev’s had mouth went dry and tears stung his eyes at this new development. He could feel his heart shatter into a million tiny pieces as he considered a horrible idea. He really didn’t want to ask, but he did anyway, just to confirm this awful idea. ‘When was this?’   
  
    Emma had frowned thoughtfully before saying, ‘I’m pretty sure it was just before you guys started dating, actually.’   
  
    And with that, Yev had stormed away and was now heading to the cafeteria to confront his boyfriend. At this point, he wasn’t sure he cared how Riley felt about being outed to the whole school. Why would it matter when their whole relationship had clearly been a lie? When he had clearly just been second place this entire time?   
  
    ‘Yev!’ Riley cried out from around the corner from the entrance of the cafeteria.   
  
    Yev approached him, feeling his annoyance and hurt grow with every step. Apparently Riley didn’t register Yev’s face of thunder, because he immediately wrapped his arms around him and sunk his face into his neck.   
  
    ‘I’m sorry I outed us,’ he murmured. ‘I really didn’t mean to, I just—’   
  
    ‘Had a crush on my dad?’ Yev blurted out, unable to help himself now as he pulled away from his boyfriend. At Riley’s stricken face, he continued bitterly, ‘Yeah, I heard about that. Now I can see why you asked so many questions about him and Ian…you were trying to break them up and get with my _dad_.’ His face screwed up in disgust and hurt, and he ran a hand through his hair as he tried to hold back from screaming at Riley in the middle of the hall. ‘And when you realised you couldn’t do that, you thought “Oh, I’ll just kiss Yev, he’s a good enough substitution. Am I right? Am I just a consolation prize?’   
  
    Riley’s eyes were welling up with tears now and he croaked out, “Yev…I…’   
  
    Yev looked away, knowing that if he looked for too much longer he would give in and try to comfort Riley, but he wouldn’t do that now. He was too mad, and he was allowed to be mad. ‘No. This is an awful fucking thing you did, Riley. I need time to decide if this is what I really want, if I’m happy with being a fucking... _replacement._ ’   
  
    He could hear Riley sniffing, clearly trying to control his tears, but Yev just shook his head and turned away, storming back down the hall and out the entrance of the school. 

* * *

Riley decided to leave around ten minutes after Yev had stormed off. Tears still fresh on his face, he exited the school and headed around the back, because that was the quickest way to get home. He could feel the anxiety blooming in his chest and he just wanted to get home before he had a full-on mental breakdown in the middle of the street. As he rounded the corner to the back of the school, though, he was knocked down with a fist to the face.   
  
    He cried out in pain as he hit the ground, holding onto his face. He was definitely going to have a black eye. He looked up to see a group of boys from school scowling down at him. Somewhere inside, he could feel his body desperately trying to choose between fight or flight. Usually, he could take at least two of these guys, but he was finding the panic attack was fully upon him now and he could hardly move.   
  
    ‘Hey, faggot,’ one of them spat. ‘Where's your fucking boyfriend?’   
  
    Riley’s legs shook anytime he tried to plant them so he could stand, so, in his panic, all he could do was stare up at them in horror as he started hyperventilating.   
  
    ‘The fag’s fucking losing it,’ another snickered. ‘Quick, grab his stuff.’   
  
    The last one, who hadn’t spoken yet, reached for Riley’s bag, but before he could touch it, he was swept off his feet and collapsed onto the ground. Riley gasped for breath as he avoided being hit by the falling boy. His vision started to blur and he couldn’t see who was saving him, but he was too busy trying to catch his breath. He could barely register the guys running away and a baton falling to the ground beside him. Next thing he knew, his cousin was staring him in the face. He gasped, holding out his hands and placing them on Frannie’s shoulders. He’d never been so glad to see her freckled face before, but he also was still panicking, so he could only gasp loudly in her face.   
  
    ‘Breathe with me, Riles,’ she whispered, holding one of his hands to her upper chest, breathing deep and slow. ‘Come on, copy my breathing. I know you can do it.’   
  
    Eventually, he could breathe properly again and promptly fell into her arms, sobbing his heart out.  All she did was brush a hand through his hair and whisper about how it was all going to be okay. Riley wasn't quite sure, though.   
  
    ‘I ruined everything,’ Riley cried.   
  
    ‘It's alright,’ Frannie murmured. ‘He’ll forgive you, sweetie. I'm so sorry I told Emma.’ 

* * *

Mickey had no idea why his son was being such a snappy little shit for the whole weekend. He figured it had something to do with Riley, though, since he hadn't been around for a while. Sunday night, he talked about it to Ian, since he seemed to understand Yev better than Mickey did. Maybe it was because Ian had a slightly more typical childhood than Mickey did.   
  
    ‘How has Yev been to you lately?’ Mickey asked as he laid in bed next to his husband, who was doing a fucking _crossword_ like this was a sit-com or some shit.   
  
    Ian shrugged. ‘Fine. Quantitative data and ten letters?’   
  
    Mickey sighed. ‘What letters have you got already?’   
  
    Ian shoved the crossword book into Mickey’s hands and Mickey studied the letters for a moment, trying to see the remaining ones: S_ _ T _ _ _ I _ _.   
  
    ‘Statistics,’ Mickey answered before handing Ian back the book. ‘Anyway, Yev has been ignoring me, and when he’s not, he’s snapping at me. I don’t know what I’ve done. Can you talk to him?’   
  
    Ian groaned. ‘Can’t you do it? I already talked to him about safe gay sex. It’s your turn.’   
  
    Mickey rubbed his face in frustration. ‘No, I can’t, because he’s mad at me.’   
  
    Ian sighed, shoving his book off to the side and settling in for some cuddles and sleep. ‘Fine, we’ll talk to him together, but I deserve some kind of dick or ass reward for this.’   
  
    Mickey grunted and nuzzled his pillow, trying to get comfortable. ‘I’ll give you morning head or some shit, just shut the fuck up.’ 

* * *

The next morning, Yev was awoken by horrific sounds that he never wanted to hear ever, _ever_ again. Instead of just ignoring them, he slammed his hand on the wall rapidly, shouting, ‘I can fucking hear you, you disgusting dickheads! Can you not wait until I’m out of the house?’   
  
    Since the walls were so fucking thin, he could hear his dad say, ‘Well, that’s a fucking boner killer.’   
  
    Yev rolled his eyes and settled into his bed, completely done with the day already. He hadn’t slept well this whole weekend, not being able to get Riley’s destroyed look out of his head. It hurt so bad just to think about, but he also felt really hurt thinking of Riley trying to get his dad and then just settling for him instead. He felt bad about snapping at his dad all the time, too, but he couldn’t help it. It was like if Riley had had a crush on anyone else before, he would want to punch them too.   
  
    It was only a few more minutes before his dads came bursting into his room. Dad sat on the end of his bed, while Ian knelt on the floor beside his bed.   
  
    ‘What the fuck’s up with you?’ Dad barked, clearly frustrated.   
  
    Ian sighed, rolling his eyes and gently asking, ‘Yev, what’s going on? Why are you snapping at your dad all the time? You’ve been in a shitty mood all weekend.’   
  
    ‘Is it about Riley?’ Dad asked bluntly.   
  
    Yev’s blood boiled just hearing his dad say his name. It was a strange feeling, being jealous of your father, who had no idea that your boyfriend used to have a crush on him. ‘Shut the fuck up and get the fuck out!’   
  
    Ian frowned, hurt. ‘Yev! Don’t speak to us like that. Why can’t you just tell us what’s wrong?’   
  
    ‘Because I’m angry and I don’t want to talk about it!’ Yev shouted. ‘Riley fucking had a crush on Dad, okay? He had a crush on you and tried to break you guys up, and when he realised he couldn’t, he started a relationship with me.’   
  
    Dad’s eyes widened in shock, but Ian merely asked, ‘Did Riley tell you that?’   
  
    Yev frowned, unsure of why that mattered. ‘No…Some chick did.’   
  
    ‘Then you probably don’t know his side of the story,’ Ian pointed out. ‘I know Riley can be a little bit of a shit, but I don’t think he would purposefully set out to hurt you, Yev.’   
  
    ‘He had a crush on me,’ Dad stated, seemingly trying to figure out how that worked. ‘Okay. I can believe that, since he was always around here, asking questions, but, Yev, I think Ian’s right. He wouldn’t do that to hurt you. If it’s true, is it shitty? Hell yeah. Maybe, though, that wasn’t his intention, and if it isn’t…you know what you gotta do, right?’   
  
    Yev shook his head.   
  
    Dad smiled softly before pushing a rough hand through Yev’s tangled hair, giving him a noogie. ‘Fucking get over yourself, dude.’   
  
    Yev shoved his dad away before sighing and nodding. ‘Fine. I’m sorry, okay?’   
  
    His dads both nodded, seemingly pleased with a job well done, before they left the room. _Probably to finish what they started_ , Yev realised in disgust. After a moment, Yev sighed again and reached for his phone. It had a few texts from Riley and one missed call from Frannie, but that was all. At the beginning of the weekend, there were a lot more apology texts and voicemails, but now it was only down to a few texts. Yev clicked on Riley’s contact and the phone rang out. Maybe he was mad at Yev now. Yev scowled to himself. 

* * *

After a weekend since he was attacked by those guys and Yev pretty much dumped him, Riley felt a little bit better. He was still heartbroken and panicked about returning to school tomorrow (luckily it was a long weekend), but he was still better than before the weekend.   
  
    He settled down for breakfast with his mom and tried to ignore her insistence to talk about what happened yet again. She knew everything about him and Yev now, and what had happened with his black eye, but she still seemed mostly interested in the Mickey crush, which Riley was honestly fucking sick of talking about.   
  
    ‘Well, didn’t you only date him because he's a tiny Mickey?’ Mom questioned. ‘You know, I’ve done that a few times, except my Mickey’s were all actual ex-boyfriends.’   
  
    Riley huffed out in annoyance. ‘No, I didn’t only date him because he’s Mickey’s son.’   
  
    ‘Are you sure?’ she pressed. ‘Because it would make a lot of sense. Maybe Yev’s right, and maybe you should face it and sort it out.’   
  
    Finally having had enough, Riley stood and snapped, ‘I’m dating him because I love him!’   
  
    He frowned as his mom only responded with wide eyes, looking over his shoulder. When he looked, he saw Yev standing there in the back door, dumbfounded. He glanced back to see his mother pretty much sprinting up the stairs and out of sight.   
  
    ‘Of course,’ Riley murmured to himself before facing Yev, heart pounding heavily in his chest.   
  
    ‘You love me?’ Yev asked, frowning.   
  
    Riley couldn’t help but notice how _good_ Yev looked in the mornings — dark hair in disarray, blue eyes softened with sleep. Just looking at him, his heart pounded a resounding _YES_! Still, all he could find it in him to say was, ‘No.’   
  
    Yev’s eyebrows arched, so similar to Mickey’s, and Riley winced. ‘But you just said you did.’   
  
    Riley sighed, running a hand through his hair as the anxiety pricked at his chest. ‘I can’t love someone I’m not in a relationship with, Yev. It’s too hard.’   
  
    ‘Who said we weren’t in a relationship?’ Yev scowled. ‘Man, I said I needed to think, but your dramatic ass automatically jumps to us breaking up.’   
  
    ‘You were really mad,’ Riley murmured, looking down at his shoes. ‘You haven’t spoken to me in a few days now.’   
  
    His chin was tipped up by Yev’s familiar, warm fingers. Yev looked deeply into Riley’s eyes, seeing the love there he’d wanted all along. ‘I said I needed _time_ , Riles. What does that mean to you?’ After a moment of studying Riley’s face, his expression darkened. ‘Where the fuck did you get that black eye?’   
  
    Riley pushed Yev away, but held onto his hand so he knew he still wanted this. ‘It’s nothing. Forget it.’   
  
    ‘No,’ Yev insisted, coming closer to examine it better. ‘Fuckin’ tell me.’   
  
    Riley sighed deeply. ‘Some guys harassed me outside of school when they found out about us, but Frannie took care of them.’   
  
    ‘Not well enough,’ Yev growled.   
  
    Riley scoffed. ’Trust me, they’ve learnt their lesson.’   
  
    Yev huffed. ‘Are they dead?’   
  
    ‘No.’   
  
    ‘Not good enough.’   
  
    ‘Shut the fuck up, you drama queen. We’re not going to do anything about these guys, Frannie did enough, and anything else we can deal with as they come. No hunting anyone down, okay?’   
  
    Yev just rolled his eyes. ‘Fine.’   
  
    ‘Can we just get back to the way we were?’   
  
    ‘Fine.’   
  
    Riley smiled softly, pressing a small kiss to Yev’s cheek, but pulling away automatically when he heard his mother’s squeal from the staircase. ‘For fuck’s sake, Mom.’   
  
    ‘We’re definitely having a family dinner next week!’ she cried out. ‘People need to know about this shit and we need to show our support!’   
  
    Yev sighed, resting his forehead against his _boyfriend’s_. ‘Not looking forward to that.’   
  
    ‘No way,’ Riley agreed.   
  
    The boys then kissed, knowing the worst is over. What they didn’t know was that they had cut the main head off the beast, but in its place sprouts many more, and they had a lot more to deal with. But right now they were happy and they deserved to be for the moment, they really didn’t need to know about all that yet.   
  
    They’d find out for themselves soon enough.

**Author's Note:**

> How do you think the family dinner will go? :)


End file.
